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The Art of Compassion: Mosaic Masterpieces Awaits You!

by brian in SAFETY

The Art of Compassion: Mosaic Masterpieces Awaits You! 

By Marina Sampanes Peed
Executive Director of Mosaic Georgia

Picture this: A quiet evening, you’re cozily settled in, deeply engrossed in that new bestseller or the latest binge-worthy series. Your phone buzzes, then rings. It’s a dear friend, voice quivering, entrusting you with a painful revelation – they or their child has experienced the unthinkable – the brutality of interpersonal violence/abuse.

Most people assume that a resource is available – through hospitals and local police departments. In fact, here and across most of Georgia, private, nonprofit organizations like Mosaic Georgia’s Children’s Advocacy & Sexual Assault Center, provide the direct services and support to victims of abuse and assault. Mosaic Georgia’s hotline 866-900-6019 is here for you.

What is it worth to you to know that help is available, 24/7, if you or your loved one needed it?

Interpersonal violence – be it physical, sexual, psychological – leave traumatic injuries that don’t just fade with time; they linger, hidden behind barriers of shame and silence. While we learn more about the neurobiology of trauma and make progress to lift the blanket of stigma, it’s community-based services like Mosaic Georgia that truly light the path to healing.

But why is this 24/7 support essential?

1. Immediate Support in Crisis: The aftermath of disclosure of violence is often chaotic, clouded with fear and confusion. An available helpline means immediate guidance, ensuring the safety of the victim and pointing them toward the right resources, whether medical, legal, or psychological.

2. Immediate Coordination of Care: Mosaic Georgia mobilizes a response team to provide advocacy supports, medical forensic care, mental health supports, and coordination with law enforcement.

3. Building Resilience: Lingering effects of violence affect one’s personal safety, ability to work or study, sleep, or focus. We assist with mental health and wellness care so people of all ages can develop their personal mental health toolkits that support and strengthen every aspect of their lives. We also provide no-cost legal services to access protection of their personal safety, and ensure their rights are not further harmed by the perpetrator.

4. Empower the Community: Knowing that help is always available strengthens the community as a whole. It empowers friends, neighbors, and family members to guide their loved ones toward the assistance they need.

How Can I Help?

People tell me they are glad that someone is doing this work, even though they don’t think they could do it. I feel the same way about surgeons and water reclamation experts. Here is a great way to support this mission and add to your art collection.

Our 4th annual “Mosaic Masterpieces”—an Art Auction & Happy Hour, not just for the art enthusiast but for every heart that beats for a compassionate community.

This event isn’t just an art auction. It’s a gathering that stitches together resilience, courage, and community spirit. With professional fine art, pieces by community leaders, students, and survivors, it’s a two-hour soulful experience.

By contributing – whether it’s through sponsorship, attendance, or art acquisition – you’re not just adding to your collection. You’re championing a cause, ensuring that every cry for help echoes with the comforting reply: “We’re here for you.”

Take a look at sponsorship opportunities, download a social media toolkit, contribute art, peruse our photo gallery from past events, or volunteer: https://www.mosaicgeorgia.org/mosaic-masterpieces/

Buy your ticket to Mosaic Masterpieces!
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When Love Hurts: A Look at the Realities of Intimate Partner Violence

by brian in SAFETY

When Love Hurts: A Look at the Realities of Intimate Partner Violence

Kendall Circle Headshot

By Kendall Wolz
Mental Health and Wellness Manager at Mosaic Georgia

What is the difference between intimate partner violence and domestic violence?

The term intimate partner violence more broadly encompasses violence within relationships, whereas domestic violence typically applies to individuals living within the same household.

In the 1970s and 1980s, women’s rights groups elevated the voices and raised awareness of crimes committed against wives by their husbands. In response to the campaigns, domestic violence shelters opened for women seeking refuge from their abusive husbands. Largely, people viewed domestic violence as a gendered issue- one where married women were the victims.

Because violence in relationships is not limited to heterosexual, married couples, the term intimate partner violence was introduced. The World Health Organization (WHO) defines intimate partner violence as “behavior within an intimate relationship that causes physical, sexual or psychological harm, including acts of physical aggression, sexual coercion, psychological abuse and controlling behaviors” and the definition covers violence by both current and former spouses and partners.1

Intimate partner violence and domestic violence apply to adult victims, while the term “teen dating violence” recognizes that minors and young adults also experience abusive patterns in relationships.

“But, he doesn’t hit me.”  

Intimate partner violence includes but is not limited to acts of physical violence. The Power and Control Wheel visually depicts the various ways it shows up in relationships.2 The outer wheel recognizes physical and/or sexual violence as a common occurrence. But the spokes of the wheel describe intimidation, emotional abuse, isolation, denying/minimizing/blaming, using the children, using privilege, economic abuse, and coercion/threats.

Abusers use various methods to exhibit power and maintain control in the relationship. Without intervention, the cycle outlined in the wheel perpetuates itself.

What is the prevalence of intimate partner violence?

Intimate partner violence is more common than people realize and accounts for 15% of all violent crime. And according to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence 25-50% of people in relationships experience at least one form of relationship violence.

  • About 1 in 3 women and 1 in 4 men report having experienced severe physical violence from an intimate partner in their lifetime.
  • About 1 in 5 women and 1 in 13 men have experienced contact sexual violence by an intimate partner.
  • 14% of women and 5% of men report having been stalked by an intimate partner.
  • The cost of intimate partner violence over a victim’s lifetime is estimated at $103,767 for women.

Data from the CDC’s 2019 Youth Risk Behavior Survey indicate that among U.S. high school students, 1 in 12 experienced physical dating violence and 1 in 12 experienced sexual dating violence within the previous year. Female students and those who identified as LGBTQ or were unsure of their gender identity experienced higher rates of dating violence.3

Ripple Effects

Lives of victims are affected in numerous and damaging ways.

Emotional pain is at the forefront. This can manifest as distress, loss of self-confidence and self-esteem, anxiety, panic attacks, sadness, shame, guilt, internal tension, stress, anger or despair. Many victims experience post-traumatic stress disorder, commonly known as PTSD. In addition to physical injuries, emotional stress contributes to deteriorating health such as sleep and eating disorders, chronic pain, digestive issues, and weakened immune systems.

Humans are social beings, and their interactions fulfill a wide range of physical, emotional, psychological, and social needs.

Intimate partner violence causes a pattern interrupt.

Routine, healthy dynamics and interactions shift. A support network is crucial yet those living with intimate partner violence often lose the trust and esteem of loved ones which can cause isolation. Power imbalances also negatively affect relationships with children.

The broader societal implications of partner violence are extensive. For the victim, requiring sick leave and trouble focusing can lead to job loss. On the grander scale, there are public health costs such as strain on healthcare, social services, and the public safety and legal systems. Employers are affected through insurance costs and reduced employee productivity.

Effects on Young Bodies and Minds

Furthermore, intimate partner violence leaves lasting imprints on children who witness the abuse, and it places them at higher risk of being victimized also.

As many as 1 in 5 children witness intimate partner violence in their lifetime.4 One of the most concerning realities of the impact of intimate partner violence on children is that approximately 1 in 5 homicides of children aged 2-14 are related to intimate partner violence. Children growing up in homes where abuse and violence are normalized are more likely to use violence as a means of conflict resolution than their peers not exposed. Witnessing intimate partner violence as a child is an adverse childhood experience (ACE). Higher ACE scores are associated with a multitude of negative long-term outcomes including early death, chronic physical health issues, mental health challenges, and relationship struggles.

Shining a light on the realities of violence helps to bring about awareness. Intimate partner violence is all around us and needs to be exposed rather than shrouded in secrecy and kept behind closed doors. Talking about it, sharing (the uncomfortable) information, and modeling healthy behavior can help initiate a shift in the societal norms and attitudes that perpetuate violence in intimate relationships.

If you or someone you know has experienced intimate partner violence, there is help available. You can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or text “START” to 88788.

[1] https://apps.who.int/violence-info/intimate-partner-violence/ 

[2] https://www.nsvrc.org/sites/default/files/2019-08/Gender%20Neutral%20Power%20Control%20Wheel.pdf 

[3] https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/intimatepartnerviolence/teendatingviolence/fastfact.html 

[4] https://assets.speakcdn.com/assets/2497/dv_and_children.pdf 

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From Awkward to Empowered: Rethinking “the Talk”

by brian in SAFETY

Someone’s Gotta Say It

From Awkward to Empowered: Rethinking “the Talk”

By Marina Sampanes Peed
Executive Director of Mosaic Georgia

Do you remember the whirlwind of emotions and questions that came with growing up? I sure do. Not too long ago, I was gently reminded that I’ve stepped into the “woman of a certain age” chapter in life. And what a vibrant chapter it is! As a proud mom of two wonderful grown-up kids, and having weathered life’s many unexpected twists, I often find myself reflecting on those pivotal parenting moments. Recently, a close friend (and a mom to some spirited youngsters) curiously asked about my journey through their hormone-driven teenage years. With a smile, I admitted, “You know, I thought I had all the answers and would be the perfect parent… until we brought our daughter home from the hospital. Talk about humbling!” 

As parents, our protective instincts are on high alert. From the rising cost of living and healthcare to the daily news about guns, active shooter drills, student debts, and challenges to our fundamental rights, it can feel a bit overwhelming. But amidst this whirlwind, it helps to start where you are, with what is in your control. Let’s begin with those heart-to-heart talks about the changes they are feeling.   

In this rapidly changing world, it’s crucial for adults to overcome their hesitations and ensure our children and teens are well-informed and equipped with facts about their bodies, sexual contact, self-confidence and communication skills.

Discomfort is Just a Feeling: You’re Not Alone

We’ve all been there. That slight unease when broaching certain topics with our kids. Most of us didn’t have great role models in the “birds and the bees” conversations (that I even wrote “birds and the bees” in 2023 should be instructive). Some fear that if you talk about sex, it will encourage them to act on that new information. As if they aren’t naturally curious about the body parts they carry with them already.  

Why Your Silence Isn’t Always Golden

Whether we like it or not, today’s youth are surrounded by sexualized messages – from advertisements, TV and movies, music, social media, and even pornography.  

Here is what we know to be true: Normalizing discussions about bodies, hormones, relationships, values, and consequences are protective factors that can reduce early risky sexual activity and sexual harms.   

Calling body parts the proper terms without blushing or whispering is the first step. Read this next section out loud: 

Start at the top:  Head, forehead, eyes, nose, lips, ears, shoulders, arms, hands, fingers, chest, breast, abdomen, penis, testicles, anus, vulva (includes labia, urethra, clitoris, vagina), thighs, calves, foot, toes.  

If you can’t read or say these words out loud, your assignment is to work through your discomfort.  Parts are parts. 

The Danger of Secrecy and Shame

Kids can read the room. When adults avoid talking about human development or speak with declarative statements that shut down conversation, they create an environment of secrecy and shame. Parents who tell kids to “wait until marriage” (message reinforced to girls) for religious or cultural reasons, without educating about sexual activity, put their kids at greater risk for unintended harms. This creates a fertile ground for abusers. People who sexually abuse and exploit others thrive on coercion and secrecy. They manipulate their victims over time, creating damaging repercussions. The lifelong effects of childhood sexual abuse are many and varied, depending on the type, frequency and intensity of abuse, and child’s relationship to the abuser. 

Did you know 25% of girls and 17% of boys K-12 ages (in both public and private education) have experienced some form of sexual abuse? These statistics represent real individuals, often victims of people within their close circle. Their language used often in describing genitals and the sexual acts reveal a lack of basic education about their bodies. Concerns about pregnancy from non-vaginal intercourse are common

The Statistics Have Names and Faces

At Mosaic Georgia, for example, over 1,500 children and youth are seen each year for harms arising from sexual abuse or exploitation. We’ve worked with minors who became parents due to familial sexual abuse and commercial trafficking. The trajectory of their lives are forever changed because of sexual abuse.

Parents of these youth are often shocked that the abuse was happening and lament that they thought their child was too young to talk about such things. 

And there are as many adults who experienced sexual abuse as children, who later in life seek resources and support in their healing journey. Most victims hold their experiences in silence, fearing that “telling” will cause more harm to themselves and their family. Abstinence-only messages further inflict shame and guilt on young victims, contributing to mental health struggles, including depression, substance abuse, and suicidal thoughts. 

Shifting Perspective: From Discomfort to Empowerment

Think back to your childhood. Do you remember the tingles, the whispers, the giggles, and the myths associated with s-e-x? Remember the confusion and perhaps even the fear?  

We can do better. Comprehensive sexual education goes beyond biology and mechanics to include the emotional and ethical facets. It’s about teaching respect for self and others, understanding boundaries and consent, and fostering healthy relationships. It’s about creating an environment where our children can grow up understanding their bodies, respecting and valuing a partner, and building meaningful, respectful relationships.

Parents as First Teachers, Schools as Allies

Parents weave a tapestry of trust, respect, and knowledge with their kids through everyday conversations. Spending time to listen, share, and even laugh about life’s mysteries will build bonds and trust. While parents are a child’s first teachers, there is no knowledge test to pass in order to become a parent. Parents have varying levels of knowledge, skills, and confidence to talk about human reproduction, pregnancy, childbirth, and parenthood.  

Schools can bridge this information gap, ensuring all students have access to factual information and understand the risks and consequences of varied sexual activity. And the curriculum is a great basis for discussion between parent and child.  

A collaborative approach ensures that all our children receive consistent, relevant, and age-appropriate information. This shared responsibility can also alleviate some of the pressures parents might feel about having these discussions on their own.

Resources to Help

For parents who may be unsure where to start or how to approach these topics, there are numerous resources available. Organizations like Mosaic Georgia, among others, offer tools to initiate these essential conversations.  

There are more books and curriculum on-line that you can read first, then share with your kids. Sometimes it’s easiest for each to read on their own and then discuss together.  Like a book club for child/adolescent health.

Call to Act: An Investment in Their Future

It’s natural to feel discomfort, but let’s channel that unease into action. After all, our children’s empowerment and safety are well worth the effort. 

When we know better, we do better.

The path forward is paved with knowledge, empathy, and understanding. Let’s take the necessary steps to ensure that our children grow up with the confidence and tools they need to navigate the complex world of sexual health and relationships. After all, knowledge is not just power; it’s empowering. 

Thank you for reading this to the end. If you’d like to talk with me about protecting all our children, please reach out to marinap@mosaicga.org  Let’s be the best village we can be for future generations. 

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National Suicide Prevention Month: The Impact of Sexual Violence on Mental Health

by brian in SAFETY

National Suicide Prevention Month: The Impact of Sexual Violence on Mental Health

Kendall Circle Headshot

By Kendall Wolz
Mental Health and Wellness Manager at Mosaic Georgia

“I feel hopeless.”
“I just don’t know how I can continue with this pain.”
“Sometimes I think dying is the only way.”
“I don’t really want to die, but I think about it all the time.” 
 

It is common for therapists to hear phrases like these when sitting with clients in the aftermath of sexual violence. The phrases reveal the depth of the pain that sexual trauma creates. Many clients who share these words struggle with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) symptoms such as nightmares, intrusive thoughts, hypervigilance, avoidance of reminders of the trauma, anxiety, and depression. The psychological impacts of sexual violence disrupt survivor’s daily lives.  

Real-World Aftereffects of Trauma

Take a moment to remember the last time you went grocery shopping. You probably got in your car, turned on the radio, drove to the store, picked up the items you needed, checked out, drove home, and unloaded the groceries.  

A survivor with PTSD symptoms may have a very different experience. A survivor may choose to go to a grocery store across town to avoid the possibility of running into their abuser at the local store. They may find themselves constantly looking in the review mirror for any indication that danger is nearby. If a vehicle matching that of their perpetrator pulls near them, they may experience a surge of anxiety and panic that lasts long after they realize it is just a similar vehicle not the abuser. As they browse the aisles in the store, they may find themselves frozen for an unknown amount of time when they see the type of chips they ate prior to being assaulted. When they finally return home, they barely have the energy to unload the groceries. This was a single shopping trip. While completing the shopping trip is a success for that survivor, they may also feel defeated because the previously simple tasks now require more than they feel they can sustain.

The Troubling Links Between Sexual Violence, PTSD, and Suicide Risk 

Research illustrates the significant link between sexual assault and PTSD. One study found that 94% of women who were raped experienced PTSD symptoms during the two weeks immediately following the rape. About 30% of the women reported continued symptoms nine months later. The National Women’s Study reported that almost one-third of all rape victims develop PTSD sometime during their lives and 11% of rape victims currently suffer from the disorder (1). 

The effects of PTSD can be unrelenting.  

Psychological distress, difficulty with activities of daily living, and disrupted sleep patterns often result in an increased risk of suicidal ideation and suicidal attempts. 

Left untreated, the symptoms of PTSD will often result in feelings of hopelessness which places someone at a significant risk of suicide. Eapen and Cifu (2020) found that among people who have been diagnosed with PTSD at some point in their lifetime, approximately 27% have attempted suicide. A body of research (2) provides evidence that traumatic events such as childhood abuse may increase a person’s suicide risk.  

When a client discloses in session one of the phrases above, the first response as clinicians often involves normalizing their feelings. It makes sense in the aftermath of sexual trauma that a person would not want to endure the pain that seems like it will last forever. It makes sense that they would experience feelings of hopelessness when their entire world has been changed. Clinicians strive to instill hope for their clients that with consistent therapy, the establishment of safety and a support system, and the regular use of coping skills, the symptoms that currently wreak havoc in their lives will decrease.  

Healing can and does happen following sexual violence. 

What to Do If You or a Friend are Experiencing Suicidal Thoughts

If you are experiencing suicidal ideation and are thinking about ending your life, know that you are not alone and there is help available. There are likely people you know, love, and trust who have also experienced suicidal thoughts. This moment of pain, despair, and feeling like there is no other way will not last forever. If you feel like your life is in immediate danger, please call 911 right away. If you are in Georgia, you can call the Georgia Crisis Access Line 1-800-715-4225. If there is a person in your life that you love and trust, reach out to them and let them know you are having these thoughts. If possible, avoid being alone. You can also call or text the Suicide and Crisis Line at 988. Reach out and let someone support you in this time of need. It does not have to be the end. 

If someone you know is experiencing suicidal ideation or is talking about ending their life, the same resources listed above are available. If they have shared their thoughts and pain with you, acknowledge the courage it took for them to voice their need. Remind them how important they are and how much you care for them. If they are unwilling to call the resources listed above, you can take the step and call for them. Trained crisis counselors can guide you in supporting your friend. If they are in immediate danger, call 911 right away. 

References

  1. U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs and National Center for PTSD
    https://www.ptsd.va.gov/professional/treat/type/sexual_assault_female.asp

     2. U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs and National Center for PTSD https://www.ptsd.va.gov/professional/treat/cooccurring/suicide_ptsd.asp

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3 Steps to Protect Our Kids from Abusers: On-line and In-person

by brian in SAFETY

Someone’s Gotta Say It

3 Steps to Protect Our Kids from Abusers: On-line and In-person

Marina Headshot (1)

By Marina Sampanes Peed
Executive Director at Mosaic Georgia

A friend used to be a kid who went to the same school or lived down the block. Today, friends are met online with few, if any, community supports. This is a predator’s playground.

“It’s not IF, but WHEN” your child will be exposed to people who may want to harm them. As parents and guardians, we must adapt our strategies to protect children. This means we are going to get uncomfortable. It is easiest if we start talking about physical, emotional, and sexual health with kids from an early age as a normal part of living. Kids get messages about their changing bodies, their body autonomy, and relationships every single day. Even the most engaged, helicopter parents cannot control the harmful messages kids receive.

“Stranger Danger” doesn’t help because over 90% of sexual abuse/harm is done by someone with easy access to your child. Someone they don’t think of as a stranger. A friend used to be a kid who went to the same school or lived down the block. Today, a “friend” is someone they “met” online – via SnapChat, Instagram, Twitter, TikTok, WhatsApp, Kik, Discord, Kanakuk, Reddit, Yik Yak, and numerous dating/meet-up platforms.
Most of the youth we see at Mosaic Georgia were abused by trusted adults in their lives. A growing number were groomed by people they met online. You may have seen the show “Catfish.” It documents people who create fake identities and personas online to deceive people looking for relationships.

It starts out seemingly innocent and the abuser cultivates an emotional attachment without ever being in the same room. Then manipulation to send photos, videos, and then plan to meet. If they get uncomfortable and try to disengage, threats to publicize images/conversations or send to parents/school/employer are used.

So what to do? Resilience is built through factual information, a sense of self-worth and belonging, and coping strategies.

1. Don’t Worry, Get Ready! Talk With Your Kids provides great tips and information for parents and caregivers to nurture education, healthy behaviors, and relationships throughout a child’s development. Age-appropriate information that tracks a child’s developmental curiosity help grown-ups feel more comfortable with the conversations. Please, use anatomical words to describe all body parts – not just eye, nose, ear, hand, knee, etc. The more you normalize names for genitals, the easier your conversations will be as the kids grow.

2. Talk with your kids – regularly, over time. When you look, you will see prompts almost every day to explore situations, perspectives, healthy alternatives. Ask, “have you seen this?” “what do you think of …?” “how do you think they feel?” “what would you do?” Listen as much as you speak. Acknowledge the inevitable eye-rolls, and let them know you are trying. You love them and want to keep them safe.

3. Practice what you preach. Encourage kids to trust their intuition about their personal safety. Encourage them to use their voice. A real friend won’t ask you to do something that you are uncomfortable with or don’t want to do. Help them determine their personal physical boundaries with family, friends, and others. Don’t force them to hug someone they don’t want to. (You can tell the overbearing adult that you appreciate their support in helping the kids manage their personal boundaries.) Let them know that IF something happens, you will be there for them and they won’t get in trouble if they tell.

Teens and adults who derive gratification from abusing and controlling others – especially kids – look for vulnerabilities that open doors for access – kids who are hungry for attention, less likely to assert themselves, or tell someone about the “special” relationship.

You can provide protective factors that will reduce their risk and improve their recovery should such harms occur. Remember: the responsibility always rests with the abuser.

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Life is a Dance

by brian in SAFETY

Mayra Paradas: Life is a Dance

Women’s History Month Feature

An interview with Dance Teacher Mayra Paradas and Ashia Gallo, MPA, Wholeness Collective Coordinator

Mayra Paradas is the passionate, bi-lingual dance teacher and personal trainer who has brought new and fun ways to heal to Mosaic Georgia’s Wholeness Collective! For Womens’ History Month, we are proud to feature Mayra and capture her thoughts on womanhood, making a living while prioritizing your dreams, and advice she’d give to women and survivors of trauma.

—

What is one thing you love about being a woman?

How we can be nurturing and strong at the same time – We can be a mother and wife and build businesses and a home.

When did your interest in dance begin?

I always knew I wanted to try dance since I was a child, but we couldn’t afford it at the time. Then, in high school dance was offered as a main class I could take. Every day, for four years. For free!

My dance teacher at the time, Natalie Cruse, really encouraged my passion. An honor in our dance class was developing your own choreography to be performed at the annual show. I auditioned twice and didn’t make it. But the third time, during Senior Year, I was featured in a solo/trio dance that I created! After that, I was obsessed with dance and learning. I was more confident and would be dancing in the aisles at Walmart!

Did you end up choosing a fine arts school post-high school?

No because I hadn’t been studying dance long enough. I ended up with an academic and dance scholarship to Lawson State Community College in Birmingham, Alabama after high school. I joined the dance team, worked with a nonprofit dance studio, and started doing dance ministry for multiple churches. It was one of the best times in my life. I was offered dance captain at school but had to turn it down my second year. Life was changing…

Yes, please share about your experiences as a young wife and mom!

My husband Joel and I were set up for high school prom. Super awkward, but we liked each other and come from the same [Dominican] culture, so it worked. We married and had my daughter in my early 20s, while I started college the same year. My son came a couple of years later. It was VERY HARD to juggle everything. Creating a family and getting my education at the same time.

It was also hard for Joel to get used to it from a cultural perspective. He’d grown up around housewives. But my mom was a businesswoman – she had a hair salon in Birmingham and owns a restaurant in Buford, GA called Oregano Latin Bar and Grill that specializes in Colombian and Dominican food – so I never knew any different. If I could change anything, I’d maybe not do so much so young!

Can women have it all?

It depends on your expectations; you can get close, but too many dreams make it difficult. Putting effort into one area takes away from another. You cannot do everything perfectly. Stick to the top 3 things that mean the most to you: for me, its God, family, business.

What is one piece of advice you would give your daughter on how to navigate the world as a strong woman?

Follow your dreams with dignity and standards. Don’t be manipulated into saying yes to things you don’t want to do.

Where are things today with your family and your work?

My daughter is 10 and my son is 7 (sometimes I can’t believe I’ve been a mom for a decade!). I graduate from SCAD this Spring. LOL Schools (Live Online Learning) is my next venture. I want to create an online school that caters to children ages 4-17. My husband and I taught online while living in Punta Cana, DR during COVID, and really loved it! LOL will offer activity classes in language, art and design, school subjects, and life skills (cooking/organizing/etc.). It’ll be like Outschool.

How do you prioritize yourself so that you do not pour from an empty cup?

In order to give your best to others, give the best to yourself. Be an example. Eat, rest, and exercise well, then motivate others to do the same things. Lack of these things will cause unintentional mental health problems.

When is the last time you cried? Why?

Last big cry: Years ago, in the shower after a diagnosis with cancer (Mayra was diagnosed with spindle cell sarcoma while living in the DR. She had a golf-ball size tumor removed and is in remission). Last small cry: Feeling that the huge pressures and expectations that ruled my life were misunderstood.

What advice would you give to survivors of trauma?

There’s only so much you can do and what others can do to motivate you. You must find something bigger than yourself. Willpower only takes you so far. For me, it’s been my faith in Jesus.

To get in touch with Mayra and learn more about her dance and personal training offerings, email her at mayra.fitlife@gmail.com or contact her on Facebook at  https://www.facebook.com/mparadas1.

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Sexual Abuse & Disabilities: Myths & Realities

by brian in SAFETY

Someone’s Gotta Say It:

Sexual Abuse & Disabilities: Myths & Realities

Marina Headshot

By Marina Sampanes Peed, Executive Director of Mosaic Georgia

March is Disabilities Awareness Month, so it is a good time to dispel some myths and talk about how sexual abuse harms many of our most vulnerable kids, friends and neighbors. Disabilities affect a wide range of people with varying degrees of severity. Disabilities include impairments of the body structure/function, or mental function, that limit activities, restrict participation and ability to interact with the world. Not all disabilities are visible to the average observer.

What is Sexual Abuse?

Sexual harms can take many forms including unwanted touching, groping, sexual harassment, sexual coercion, sexual assault, and rape. Other “non-contact” forms include taking explicit images, showing pornography, exposing one’s genitals or asking them to expose themselves.

Invisible Victims & Hidden Harms

In 2022, approximately 15% of the clients we served at Mosaic Georgia had one or more disabilities. Our advocates provide support to the primary victim and non-offending caregivers or loved ones. Working beside survivors, families, law enforcement, and care providers, we see the surprise, fear, and bewilderment after a disclosure. Here are the most common misconceptions we hear, and the untold realities regarding them.

Myth #1: People with disabilities are not at risk for sexual abuse because they are not sexual beings nor sexually active.

Reality: People with disabilities have the same sexual desires and needs as non-disabled people.  Because this myth is prevalent, few children and youth with disabilities are taught about their own sexual development and health of their bodies. This information vacuum makes them more vulnerable to people who befriend (groom) them for abusive purposes.

Myth #2: Sexual abuse of people with disabilities is rare.

Reality: Most women with disabilities (83%) will be sexually assaulted in their lives. Half of girls who are deaf have been sexually assaulted compared to 25% of girls who are hearing; 54% of boys who are deaf have been sexually abused compared to 10% of boys who are hearing.

Myth #3: Any sex activity with a disabled person is rape because people with disabilities are not capable of giving consent.

Reality: Consent is a complex issue that depends on many factors, including the individual’s cognitive and communication abilities, understanding of the situation, and level of comfort and safety. While some may have difficulty with communication or decision-making, this does not mean that they are unable to consent to sexual activity. Just like everyone else, it is important to ensure that all parties involved in sexual activity are able to give informed and enthusiastic consent.

Myth #4: People with developmental disabilities are unreliable; they cannot communicate about sexual abuse or understand what is happening to them.

Reality:   Most can communicate about sexual abuse – either directly or indirectly. Some may communicate in nonverbal ways, such as through gestures, facial expressions, sign language or assistive technology. It is important for caregivers and advocates to be aware of these communication methods and to take them seriously. It is also important to recognize that people with intellectual or developmental disabilities may understand what is happening to them, even if they have difficulty communicating it.

Myth #5: People with disabilities are not attractive to sexual predators.

Reality: Sexual predators target vulnerable people. Because people with disabilities are often perceived as lacking agency and independence, they can be seen as easy targets for abuse. Issues such as social isolation, dependence on caregivers, lack of sexual health education, and limited resources/support make them more vulnerable to abuse.

Bonus Myth #6: People with disabilities cannot be sexual predators. 

Reality: People with disabilities can be both victims and perpetrators of sexual abuse. It is important to recognize that sexual abuse is a complex issue and can occur in any type of relationship, including between people with disabilities. The Justice Department found that people with intellectual disabilities are even more likely to be raped by someone they know. For women without disabilities, the rapist is a stranger 24 percent of the time, but for a woman with an intellectual disability it is less than 14 percent of the time. Furthermore, often it’s another person with a disability — at a group home, or a day program, or work — who commits the assault. Compiled data from 500 cases of suspected abuse in 2016 showed that 42 percent of the suspected offenders were themselves people with intellectual disabilities. Staff made up 14 percent of the suspects; relatives were 12 percent; and friends, 11 percent. (Shapiro, 2018) 

While so many people with disabilities experience some form of sexual abuse in their lifetime, only 3% of sexual abuses are ever reported.  This makes a case for increasing awareness of the vulnerabilities, how, when, and where abuses occur, and also develop prevention strategies.

Let us work to create a society that ensures everyone is able to live free from abuse and harm.

 

For more information:

https://thearc.org/our-initiatives/criminal-justice/talk-about-sexual-violence/

www.disabilityjustice.org/sexual-abuse/#

https://www.unfpa.org/news/five-things-you-didnt-know-about-disability-and-sexual-violence

 

Shapiro, Joseph (2018)
NPR, The Sexual Assault Epidemic No One Talks About

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February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month: How Can Adults Help?

by brian in SAFETY

February is Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month: How Can Adults Help?

Co-authored by Marina Sampanes Peed and Amanda Makrogianis Mickelsen

One in three teens experiences verbal, emotional, physical, or sexual abuse from a dating partner.

That’s a lot of young people.

Our society’s cultural norms foster these harms in a way that goes unnoticed, largely because these models are woven into the fabric of our collective mindset. Becoming aware of problematic norms and talking openly about their implications can help to change the conversation and lead to a shift towards healthy relationships.

What Exactly Is Teen Dating Violence?
Most people think of violence in the most visible form – physical harms. In fact, relationship violence includes many forms of violations of interpersonal trust and care. Dating violence (any relationship actually) may include verbal assaults and degradation, sexual coercion, assault, and abuse, psychological abuse, stalking, financial, and cyber-bullying.

The Norms We Know
The teen years are full of cognitive and physiological changes, hormonal evolutions and the navigation of social and structural expectations. Add to the mix that technology provides young people 24/7 access to pornography and constant sexual messages in marketing, social media, and entertainment…and quite the recipe emerges.

Pervasive cultural beliefs around sexuality and gender roles perpetuate unhealthy relationships and contribute to the normalization of dating violence among teens.

“Boys will be boys” and “She loves me” and “It’s not that bad”.

Society perpetuates beliefs that coercion is part of a mating dance. Girls learn very early to expect sexual aggression and violence while simultaneously being expected to prevent it.  When attachment occurs, it is tempting to excuse a partner’s harmful behavior.

The Cycle of Relationship Violence
The Teen Power and Control Wheel shows how the cycle perpetuates itself without intervention.

People who abuse may believe:

  • they possess their partner
  • strength equals physical aggressiveness
  • they have the right to control their partner in any way, including demanding intimacy
  • being a “nice guy” can cause young males to lose social capital

Their partners may believe:

  • their partner’s jealousy and possessiveness is romantic
  • they are “lucky” to have a cute, popular or powerful person “into them”
  • they are the ones responsible for solving problems in the relationship
  • abuse is normal because friends or other peers may also experience it

Our Impact
It is promising to know that this unhealthy mindset can merely be a developmental phase, leaving much opportunity for growth and change.

Young minds are like sponges absorbing information through societal observation – at home, within the family, and what is seen and read on TV, movies and in books. Their sense of self-worth is garnered from parents, family, friends and peer groups. Yet sex and consent are not topics that are talked about openly and can be seen as taboo in many households and societal institutions like church or school.

How Can Adults Provide Guidance?

  • Model healthy, nonviolent communication and self-respect
  • Be good listeners
  • Point out healthy relationships
  • Talk about the established cultural norms – and don’t be afraid to challenge them
  • Affirm individual worth and importance
  • Encourage young people to express their feelings
  • Provide tools to navigate various social settings
  • Offer a safe space for teens to talk among themselves

Challenging the Norms
Although parents may feel further away from their children during the teen years, it’s important to remember that their perceptions around established norms can shift as difficult conversations about dating violence are kept front and center. In the paraphrased words of Martin Luther King Jr. ‘our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter’.

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Why are Sexual Assaults Under-Reported?

by miguelm in HEALTH, JUSTICE, SAFETY, Uncategorized

Why are Sexual Assaults Under-Reported?

 

Most people will call the police if someone breaks into their home or steals something from their vehicle. Yet this is not the first reaction of most people who experience sexual violations.
According to rainn.org, 770 out of 1,000 sexual assaults go unreported to the police. That means that only 23% of all sexual abuse/assaults may have a response from the justice system.   

So why is it that most people do NOT call the police after experiencing sexual assault? 

There are many reasons — both personal concerns and system failures.

95% of the suspected sexual abusers are part of the victim’s family or social circle:  friend, friend of friend/family, date, boyfriend, roommate, coworker, fellow student, acquaintance, or person of power (e.g., landlord, teacher, boss).  

With this prevalence, the most common reasons given for not reporting #WhyIDidn’tReport:

  • “I just want him to leave me alone and put this behind me”
  • “He and his friends/family will make my life a nightmare”
  • “He will deny it and no one will believe me”
  • “My parents will kill him if they find out”
  • “The cops will call it “drunk sex” and tell me not to ruin his life”
  • “I was drinking, but I didn’t want to have sex”
  • “He will fire me and my friend if I tell anyone”

Social stigma and shame:  Common reactions immediately after include shame for trusting (I should have known better), self-blame (we were drinking), denial (it’s not that bad, he didn’t mean to hurt me). They feel responsible for “causing trouble” if they report their experience.   

Family or Community pressure:  In many instances (particularly with children and teens), both people are connected by family or friendship. Reporting the abuse/assault will disrupt the family system and people will “choose sides.” 

Fear or distrust of law enforcement:  The response by law enforcement varies widely by jurisdiction and the officer’s training. Fear of deportation exists when the victim or a member of the household is “undocumented.”  Language barriers also deter reporting.  

If you or someone you know experienced sexual assault or abuse, call Mosaic Georgia at 866-900-6019. We will listen to you and help you sort out your options. All services are free and confidential.  You may choose to have a medical forensic exam at Mosaic Georgia without reporting to law enforcement. 

We want you to feel comfortable and ready if you choose to report. If you later decide to report the assault, the evidence collected can be available for testing. Whether or not you end up deciding to report, we are by your side every step of the way.

 

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2021, Here We Come!

by miguelm in HEALTH, JUSTICE, SAFETY

2021, Here We Come!

 

Out with the old, in with the new! As ~tragic~ as it was to say goodbye to 2020 (yes, we are being sarcastic), 2021 is off to a hopeful start already. We have a long road ahead of us this year: There is still an ongoing health crisis that poses challenges to serving victims to the fullest while many are still stuck at home with their abusers. Furthermore, as an organization we must broaden our reach when it comes to service while maintaining the highest levels of safety for both our staff and our clients. 

While 2020 was a bust in more ways than one, Mosaic Georgia adapted and stretched to better serve our community. Here are several honorable mentions: 

  • Expanded our appointment hours to 12 hour days Mon-Fri and remained open to carry out services throughout the entire COVID-19 pandemic, despite health risks and quarantine mandates.
  • Launched our Empowerment Fund to provide key client relief resources such as emergency shelter, housing stability, counseling and more.
  • Through the CARES Act, Mosaic secured housing navigation support, rent and utilities payments for victims who suffered financially along with the abuse trauma.
  • Launched the #MayI movement on social media, a campaign that strives to change the usual conversations surrounding consent and open the floor to share how it’s a normal part of everyday life. (Follow @mayi_movement to join the discussion!)
  • Launched an enhanced role in supporting our Gwinnett children and youth who have been sexually exploited for financial purposes, thanks to a new collaboration with the Children’s Advocacy Centers of Georgia (CACGA). As the statewide coordinator for reports and response to commercial sexual exploitation of children (CSEC), CACGA notifies us to respond to youth in Gwinnett County. Mosaic Georgia activates a multi-disciplinary team to assess the situation, meet with the child/youth and coordinate care to ensure their needs are being met.

Not a bad record for one of the most confusing and chaotic years to date! Now, as we enter 2021 full steam ahead we want to share our top goals for this new year: 

  • Expand our legal services and make a difference in how we serve victims by hiring a bilingual Victim Services Attorney and bilingual Legal Navigator (Yes, we are hiring, click here to learn more!).
  • Serving more CSEC Youth as a Children’s Advocacy Center.
  • Securing more operational space! As COVID continues, it’s essential to maintain social distancing. We are searching for additional space or a larger facility that can accommodate our expanding programs and serve more clients in the safest manner possible. 

We couldn’t have achieved so much in 2020 without the support of our board, our donors and our local community. There is still a long road ahead in putting an end sexual abuse and assault and we’ll need to come together again, if not stronger in 2021 to assist those suffering, especially victims who have suffered in silence throughout the COVID-19 epidemic. 

Mosaic Georgia is so excited to go above and beyond in 2021 and we can’t wait to see what this year has in store for us! Thank you all for your continued support. 

Best wishes, 

Mosaic Georgia

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